by Vito Viganò

Emotion is the affective vibration, from within, of the way in which one is taken by a situation at a given moment. The way of involving oneself decides on the quality of one's life, on the desired well-being. The level of personal maturity, according to each individual's abilities, allows us to make the most of the emotional states that life brings about.

Let's talk about emotions. They are the vital reality for each of us, always. Usually we don't realize it, caught up as we are in concrete action. Yet, every moment is colored by a particular emotional state, which decides how to invest vitality in the moment. it is joy in enjoying a pleasure, or irritation for something that goes wrong, or anxiety for an imminent commitment.

The production of an emotion. The mechanism that gives rise to them is partly automatic. You are sensitive, always careful to grasp what interests you at the moment: things, people, situations. What you perceive, depending on how you take it, acts as a stimulus, whether pleasant or annoying, causing different physical variations. This creates the level of energy that living that moment requires, a lot of energy in anger, little in sadness. This instinctive reaction is the truth of the moment; all that remains is to decide how to live it, even if it may displease you or you would like to reject it.

Emotion becomes feeling. The sensations you feel, how you are stimulated inside, allow you to be aware of them. We have the opportunity to compare our first reaction with the reality of ourselves and our situation, to decide whether to adopt it and live it like this, or whether it is better to make a change, to experience a more appropriate emotional state. Spontaneity is replaced by calculation: from the fright of a twig, which looked like a snake, you return to peacefully enjoying walking in the woods. Sentiment is the affective tone with which we try to build a good life.

Let's talk about maturity. It's what it takes to manage emotions and feelings in a useful and rewarding way. Maturity is personal capital, a baggage of knowing how to live accumulated in the events already experienced. We keep in our memory a trace of everything we experience and how we profit from it. The most disparate memories are then reworked to derive beliefs, life principles and strategies. It is experience, the reference to which one resorts to get along well in the rest of life.

Maturity is being. The mature person is capable of moral qualities, not easy, in managing internal reality. First of all, awareness, which knows how to realize what it is experiencing, to orient it as appropriate, sees things as they are, rather than as one wishes them to be, with a control of impulses, desires, seductive stimuli, for a commitment to coherence, of loyalty to oneself. In continuous contact with others we rely on social intuition, to recognize and take into account what and how the other is experiencing.

Maturity is doing. Proceeding in a mature manner means dedicating yourself to what really matters, enjoying the pleasures of living in moderation. While you are involved in the present, you have an eye on the future to anticipate outcomes and consequences. We take action, we make ourselves heard, to resolve difficulties and problems in the way that is convenient, with respect for the opinions and rights of others.

Mature emotions. Emotions and feelings are energy, dynamism, vitality to manage. Maturity is the freedom to expose yourself to the stimuli of life, realizing the spontaneous reactions you feel, being careful, if necessary, to modulate your emotional state to decide how best to walk. 

There are many obstacles that can arise against a mature way of experiencing emotional charges: distractions, suppressions, impulsiveness, wild outbursts, blocks, addictions, weaknesses. In the next issues of our magazine the theme will be taken up again, describing how more frequent emotional states can be experienced in a mature and profitable way: beautiful ones such as joy and friendship, enthusiasm and hope; or less pleasant, such as fear and anxiety, anger and sadness, shame and envy...